A
while ago (and that is the most specific measurement of time that is still
within the realm of my understanding), I read something that was to the effect
"those with small minds talk about people, good minds talk about events,
and great minds talk about ideas". I don't remember where I read it, as
the amount of written text I have consumed recently is astronomical, but it
really struck me.
Where was I going with
this? Oh, yeah. So, on reflecting on that philosophy, I have become more aware
of when I talk about people. And perhaps my biggest test in this context is our
downstairs neighbors. It is so easy to dehumanize them, or to imagine this us-versus-them
worldview. At various times I have tried to internalize the idea that they are
individual children of our heavenly Father with their own needs, desires, and
experience, but obviously that has been hard to adjust.
Well, when we got home
today, not only was our neighbor outside, but she was standing at the top of
the stairs in front of our apartment, completely unavoidable! I sincerely and
unashamedly thought about turning around and going back to the car and driving
around for a while until she left. Incidentally, she wasn't waiting for us, she
was just talking to another neighbor, but was in the path to our door. Well, I
couldn't justify my avoidance technique, so we just walked up.
When she saw us, she
stopped her conversation, apologized for yelling at us, and thanked us for the
bread. It was a very sociable little contact. I still would have preferred to
avoid said contact, but I also just don't like sociability. I don't know. It
seems that with them I succeed at only a quasi-Christian character. We rightly
talk about what Jesus would do in our situations (I do think it is amusing that
while we write the acronym WWJD, we don't actually use it as a mnemonic device,
preferring to simply say the phrase); I feel that we miss the mark when we do not
consider how Jesus would feel, or perhaps, "Why would Jesus do what Jesus
would do". Yes, Jesus would probably tread lightly and bake bread,
although his may be unleavened. But ultimately He would do so because He loved
them.
Then again, and on the
other hand, Jesus spent His time not with those who reviled Him, but with those
who sought Him out and desired and appreciated His presence. Which makes you
wonder if while He loved His enemies, there were times when He maybe did not
particularly like them.
Well, that probably
takes philosophy far enough for one day. I talked to President today, and while
the culminating answer of prayer really didn't go any deeper, we did delve into
my emotions and what has stood in the way of truly accepting God's love in my
life. There was an interesting metaphor of sorts being presented in our
conversation. My whole mission, I have not really felt love from President
Hewlett, and I at times became inwardly critical of that fact. But, in talking
to him today, I realized that I had never let him love me, in fact, the love
had always been there but by hiding behind my competent facade, I never
accepted it. The parallels were obvious when I recognized that.
Well, anyways, despite
those vivid snapshots into my interior workings, I did not take any digital
pictures today, so I will have to paint them with words.
Sitting in our main
room, I hear the constant twittering of birds, a gentle and joyous community
mimicked by the several neighbors outside and talking, barbecuing, kids playing
in the grass. One wonders of the thoughts being conveyed in the leafy treetops,
whether they have their little squabbles as we do. Perhaps not, and perhaps we
can learn much of humanity from them, as the only words they use are musical.
One might wonder, if one was prone to fancy, if birds did not have a much
larger vocabulary, one that ranges from the finest melody of spring to the
coarse caw of conflict, but in civility they employ only the sweetest tones and
leave the rest unsaid. And in that vein, isn't it striking that the birds whose
community we call a "murder" are well known for their harsh call?
Don't we murder most often the tender hearts around us by cold words, rather
than cold steel? I aspire to be a little songbird, and strengthen my brethren
in every conversation, prayer, exhortation, and doing.
You know, I did intent
at the beginning of that paragraph to be purely descriptive, but I enjoy the
written word too much to not wrest meaning from it.
Louisiana love,
Elder DeFord
No comments:
Post a Comment